A Word for Mothers on Mother’s Day
In
1900, A. E. Winthrop tracked down fourteen hundred descendants of Jonathan and
Sarah Edwards in order to compare them with another notorious family – the
Jukes – whose descendants had cost the
New York State over a million dollars in welfare and custodial charges. The Edwards family and the Jukes family were
a study in contrasts. Of the 1200 Jukes
Winthrop studied, only 20 had ever earned a living through gainful employment,
whereas the rest had lived on welfare or were criminals. In contrast, by 1900, “this single marriage [of
Jonathan and Sarah Edwards] had produced 13 college professors, 65 professors,
100 lawyers, and a dean of an outstanding law school, 30 judges, 66 physicians
and a dean of a medical school, 80 holders of public office” including three
United States senators, mayors of three large cities, governors of three
states, a Vice-President of the United States, and a controller of the United
States Treasury. Almost all the men in
this family were college educated, and many had graduate degrees “in a time
when this was unusual.”
Members of the family wrote 135 books . . . . They edited
eighteen journals and periodicals. They
entered the ministry in platoons and sent one hundred missionaries overseas, as
well as stocking many mission boards with lay trustees. One maverick married the daughter of a South
Sea Island chieftain but even that branch reverted to type, and its son became
a clergyman.[1]
Winthrop
concluded that “there is scarcely any great American industry that has not had
one of this family among its chief promoters. . . The family has cost the country nothing in
pauperism, in crime, in hospital or asylum service; on the contrary, it
represents the highest usefulness.”
How
did this family become so great?
Winthrop had a theory, although it is probably not what many would
expect. He said that “much of the
capacity and talent, intensity and character, of the more than 1,400 of the
Edwards family is due to Mrs. Edwards.”
Though there is no doubt that the genius and spirituality of Mr Edwards
rubbed off on the family, Dodds is right when she notes that, “How children
turn out is always a reflection on their mother.”
And
this is one of the reasons we celebrate Mother’s Day every year. On this day, we are reminded how much we owe
our mothers. They gave birth to us –
which by itself is enough to merit our lifelong gratitude! – but they also put
up with our stubbornness and stupidity, fed us and clothed us and nursed us to
health in our sickness, protected us and watched over us. Most of all, they loved us even when we were
very unlovable. Mothers give. And give.
And give some more.
In
his last letter to Timothy, Paul wants his son in the faith to remember a gift
his mother gave him. “I am reminded of
your sincere faith,” he writes, “a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother
Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well” (2 Tim.
1:5). The gift Timothy’s mother gave to
him was faith – faith which had its roots in the word of God. This becomes part of the basis for Paul’s
exhortation to “fan into flame the gift of God” (v. 6). The impact that Timothy’s mother had on him
as a child through this gift reached into the future as a motivation to be
faithful in the ministry bequeathed to him by Paul. The influence of Timothy’s mother didn’t stop
when he left the home; it continued into his present life as a powerful
motivation for persevering in the faith.
We see something similar happening later in the epistle, when Paul
encourages him to “continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed,
knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been
acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for
salvation through faith in Christ Jesus” (2 Tim. 3:14-15). Paul recognized that some of the most
powerful arguments he could muster to urge Timothy forward were the memories he
possessed of the godly education given to him by his mother and grandmother.
One
of the reasons Paul only mentions Timothy’s mother and grandmother is because
his father was an unbeliever. Thus, the
entirety of his religious education fell upon the shoulders of his mother, who
did her job well. These verses
illustrate the blessing a godly mother is for her children when she has
bequeathed to them the knowledge of God’s word.
God honors mothers who acquaint their children with the sacred writings
which are able to make them wise unto salvation which is in Christ Jesus. The greatest gift a mother can give to her
children is a love of God’s word. This
is what Timothy’s mother had given to him.
As Calvin put it: Paul “sets before him his grandmother Lois and his
mother Eunice, by whom he had been educated from his infancy in such a manner
that he might have sucked godliness along with his milk. By this godly education, therefore, Timothy
is admonished not to degenerate from himself and from his ancestors.”[2]
But
you cannot give what you haven’t got.
Therefore, let every godly mother who wants to pass on a heritage of
faith to her children first give herself to the study of the word of God, the
Bible. Store up treasures of knowledge
which have as their content the doctrines of Scripture. Let the love of truth draw you into the pages
of the Bible. In that way, you will be
equipped to do for your children what Timothy’s mother did for him.
So,
in light of this, what I want to do this Mother’s Day is to encourage our
mothers here to do this very thing. The
best thing I can do for you is to encourage you to give yourself the word of
God so that you can in turn pass it on to your children. I want you to know and love the word of
God. I want the mothers here to be
theologians on fire. So I give you five
objectives relating your role as a mother to the word of God. My
hope is that these will send you hungry to the Scriptures, so that with Mary
you will choose “the good portion,” which will not be taken way from you (Lk.
10:42), and which you can then pass on to your children.
Mothers, teach your children the word of
God.
First,
it is the duty of both parents to
teach their children the word of God. The
Bible is a very patriarchal book, and it would be easy to conclude from a
superficial reading of it that it is only the father’s responsibility to pass
on the family traditions and beliefs.
However, this is not so. Although
the spiritual education of the children is the father’s ultimate responsibility
(as is indicated in Ephesians 6:4), that doesn’t mean he is the only one
involved. The book of Deuteronomy, which
is so concerned about passing on the faith to the next generation, puts both
men and women in the audience of those who need to hear the Scripture in order
to pass it on:
Assemble the people, men, women, and little ones, and the
sojourner within your towns, that they may hear and learn to fear the LORD your
God, and be careful to do all the words of this law [including the injunction of
Deut. 6:7!], and that their children, who have not known it, may hear and learn
to fear the LORD your God, as long as you live in the land that you are going over
the Jordan to possess. (Deut. 31:12-13)
According
to Proverbs 31, the godly woman “opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching
of kindness is on her tongue” (verse 26).
Certainly, those to whom she speaks are primarily those who belong to
her household (verse 27), especially her children. Of course, “wisdom” in Proverbs is not merely
genius. Its content begins with the fear
of God (1:7). In other words, the wisdom
which fills the mouth of the godly woman is fundamentally religious, and has as
its source the word of God.
One
could argue from the oneness of the marriage union, that this would imply both
unity and teamwork in the training of the children. Certainly, as in the case of Timothy, when
the father is not able to do this, it falls entirely upon the mother. It surely is included in “guiding the house”
in 1 Tim. 5:14.
However,
you cannot teach what you do not know.
For a mother to teach the word of God to their children, she must know
it. She must read it, understand its
themes, its doctrines, be able to discuss and defend it to her children. So mothers, teach your children the word of
God!
Mothers, show your children the word of God
Second,
the influence mothers have upon their children is massive. In the OT, you can see the influence of the
mother behind many of the kings of Judah and Israel, either for good or
bad. You cannot help but hear it in 2
Chron. 12:13, which comments that Rehoboam’s mother was “Naamah an Ammonitess.” You can see the evil that the daughter of
Ahab had upon her son, King Ahaziah (2 Chron. 22:3). On the other hand, the mothers of every king
are not mentioned, so when they are, it makes one wonder if it is because of
the special influence they had upon them, either for good or evil. Mothers need to make sure that the influence
they exert upon their children is seasoned by God’s word and truth. You are not only preaching to them when you
are directly teaching them out of the Bible, but you are preaching your view of
God in every act and response throughout the day. They will see what view of God you have. So immerse yourself continually in the truth
of Scripture. Doctrine is important,
and it will influence the way you live, the way you react, the way you see
yourself and the world, and thus the way your children will see themselves and
the world.
The
truth of God’s word is commended, not only through its reasonableness, but also
through its impact on people’s lives. We
all are aware of people who have come to faith when the deciding factor was not
the strength of the arguments for Christianity, but the power of godliness in a
believer’s life. I think of Josh
McDowell, who basically argued his way to the Christian faith, but when his
father – the town drunk – was converted, the whole town came to faith in Christ
because of the impact they saw faith in Christ had for him. It has been said that one of the drawing
points to Christianity in the first few centuries of its history was the love
that believers had for each other. In
the same way, a mother has the greatest opportunity to show the power of
godliness to her children.
A mother
should see every day as a day to preach the gospel to her children in her
words, in her attitudes and reactions, in her decisions, in her discipline, in
her play, in her quiet time, in her work – because that’s what is
happening. What Paton said about his
father could in many, many instances be said of godly mothers throughout the
world: “Though everything else in religion were by some unthinkable catastrophe
to be swept out of memory, were blotted from my understanding, my soul would
wander back to those early scenes, and shut itself up once again in that
Sanctuary Closet, and, hearing still the echoes of those cries to God, would
hurl back all doubt with the victorious appeal, ‘He walked with God, why may
not I?’” But God’s truth will have no
impact if it is not thoroughly digested and made a part of the individual. To get there, you need to be a student of
that word.
Mothers, pray over your children with the
word of God.
Of
all the things a mother can do for her children, I can think of no better thing
than for them to faithfully, consistently, and lovingly pray over them. Though there are no direct passages
commanding mothers in particular to pray for their children, what the Bible
does say about prayer implies it. For
example, when Paul commands us to “not be anxious about anything, but in
everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be
made known to God” (Phil. 4:6), this certainly applies to mothers who are often
in a position to be anxious about their children! Or when James tells us that “the prayer of a
righteous person has great power as it is working” (Jam. 5:16), we must not
think that he is excluding mothers who fervently pray that their children would
be made into men and women for God.
In
fact, history underscores the fact that a praying mother is a powerful
instrument in the hand of God. A great
example of this is Augustine, the fourth century bishop and theologian whose
thought has impacted the church from his day until now. He attributed his own conversion [under the
grace of God] to the prayers of his mother, Monica.
Augustine’s
mother raised him in the Christian faith despite the fact that – like Timothy’s
mother – her husband was a pagan.
Nevertheless, when Augustine went off to Carthage for school, his
mother’s training receded into the background as he wholeheartedly adopted the
immoral ways of the city. And for many
years after, Augustine lived an immoral lifestyle and embraced pagan
philosophies. It was not until his
thirties that Augustine was arrested by the Spirit of God and his life was
changed. Reflecting on his conversion
years later, he wrote this prayer: “My mother, Your faithful servant, wept to
You for me, shedding more tears for my spiritual death than others shed for the
bodily death of a son. You heard her.”[3]
But
not every prayer is heard. Jesus himself
pointed out that some prayers are useless: “And when you pray, do not heap
empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think [falsely] that they will be
heard for their many words. Do not be
like them” (Matt. 6:7-8). How then
should we pray? The place to start is to
go to the word of God, which tells us things like, “Pray then like this. . . .”
(Matt. 6:9). The word of God teaches us
how to pray, when to pray, with what words to pray, the manner of prayer, and
so on. It gives encouragements to prayer
and examples of prayer. So if you would
be a prayer-warrior, immerse yourself in the word of God. Let its language and truths fill your mouth
with words and your heart with faith and affection. Mothers! pray over your children with the
word of God.
Mothers, glorify God
in your lives with the word of God.
The
greatest reason, however, for mothers to study the Bible is not unique to
mothers but is universally applicable. The
chief end of a mother is to glorify God and to enjoy him forever. Worship is the end for which you were
created.
And
in the end, the ultimate reason you are a mother is not so that you can raise
good children. Sometimes, the fact of
the matter is that good mothers can produce very bad children. Not every godly woman has a success story
when it comes to her sons and daughters.
Does that mean that they failed in life?
No. Because God’s first and
ultimate purpose for you is not to brag about your children but to brag about
God.
But
to worship God we must know something about him, about his greatness and
majesty. Though this is revealed in the
world, it is most clearly revealed in Scripture, and especially in Christ – who
is brought to us in the pages of the Bible. Jesus told them woman at the well,
The hour in coming and is now here, when the true worshippers
will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such
people to worship him. God is spirit,
and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth. (John 4:23-24)
It
is impossible to worship God in truth without the source of truth, God’s
word. This is the reason Jesus told the
woman – who was a Samaritan – “You worship what you do not know; we worship
what we know, for salvation is from the Jews” (John 4:22); that is, the Jews
had the Bible, and the Samaritans did not.
This made their worship like a blind man trying to describe something he
had never seen or like a person trying to feel something they have never
experienced.
If
you would see God, you must see him in his word. If you would experience God, you must
experience him through the word. So
mothers, glorify God by understanding and delighting in the word of God.
Mothers, put your faith in the Word of God.
I do
not mean by Word of God merely the Scriptures.
I mean by “Word” the one who is the ultimate expression of God’s
revelation to men, and who is the object of study in the Scriptures from
beginning to end. “In the beginning was
the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God” (Jn. 1:1). God has given us his word so that we might
believe in his Word – Jesus Christ his Son.
“God so loved the world that he gave us his only Son, that whoever
believes on him might not perish but have everlasting life” (Jn. 3:16).
The
reason why this is important is because, apart from Christ, we will never teach
or show or pray or see the glory of the word of God. By nature we are all blind and spiritually
dead. It is Christ alone who by his death
on the cross cleanses us from our sins so that we can have life and sight and
feeling, so that his word is not dead words on a page but living and real. It is Christ who gives us grace and strength
to teach and show and see God’s word.
You need Christ, as do we all. So
look to him and find grace and life in him.
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